Everything had been said in the saying of nothing

There are hundreds of point of view, many ideas and explanation for his subject!
My life has been always very bussy..i always want more then I get and I always point myself new goals..Im not from rich family but also not from poor. When I finished may 16th birthdays I didnt got a car ..usually I didnt got everything what I wanted and this has learnt me that I will do my best to get it in future what I cant have now
My mum always do the best to make my life happy She showed my that money is not the most important that smile can always help you and when you do not where to go always ask
The goal of my life is not the same every time.. First I wanted to be good person .i was trying to find answer whats mean good persona, I had read Talmud, Koran, Bible, works of Tibetan monks and was study a lot works of Buddhism. Every part of ethic or religion is similar. God is the person who create world and is the line who shows what can be good and what can be bad.. The Aims are changing the same as taste is changing during all our life.
When you are child you like eating mandarins but when you are older you prefer more kiwi and you hate mandarins..My aims are like next steps in my life..im patience im hard working ,I know what is more important and what is less important..i have my own status where on the top is my happiness without hurting other people! Im trying to be not selfish , not rude, always sincer, belive that my life is not just for me, understand that sometimes you have to lose something to win something other..i try to not hurt anyone help as much as I can , I do not have enemies, I forgive and ask for forgiveness I strongly believe that you can create something good something AMAZING only from zero from nothing
I had left my house , my mum and sister who I love the most in my lifeand I had traveled to City where Id has decided to study.It was diffcult decision because I had to leave all my friends, all my old life, all people who loves me and I love so much..it is so difficult to start all over again your life. When you are noone, when u have nothing.. you have only you plans only your idea in which you strongly believe! That was me 3 years ago! Simple girl who decided to live 600km from home in place where I didnt know where go to market, hospital or I didnt have any one!i had just my dreams! I was happy coz im STUDENT! Coz I live near my beloved Sea! Coz there somewhere is person who I love so much my boy from CASA..when I thinking about past I think I was too romantically shy..i belived that people are good that you can trust them..How wrong I was!
University who seems to be amazing ..is just peace of hard working place..People from city were boring, professors not much intelligent and sea was too far away..I was homless,I come back to family one time in 4months, I got lost in my life.. everything was blurry, gray .More then this The person who I gave my heart change opinion about me and decided to cheat me with other girs-Life- you would say this is life you would say.. Yes it is truth ..I hate this words coz this special words I heard from the person to who I trusted after when I called to beg for help when my father died.
Life is better then cruel father, is better then helpful mother..more you are older more you understand it. ..Nietzsche said that Things which doesnt kill you, make you stronger! This is what life do with us! Make us stronger however is so hard to stand it like solider.. ..When you need something you try to get it when it is not fast you getting lesson from life that you has to be more patience..that in good time you will get ..when you hard working you always get it.
When you are child when you are young, you are always think in the way which you imagine: when I will be older I .. hundreds of thoughts in your head..that u can come back to home at any time you want.. that you can buy toy which your mum cant buy ,that you can go wherever you want when you are older like teenager you dream about Freedom ..you have your imagination of fantastic life, about , travel any place you want it is so funny coz your life is only around parties, problems with school or with parents. .everyone is bad in you opinion and everyone wants to destroy you.. how pessimistic you arewhen you problems with dating with girl you like or another spot on your nose is more terrified then Hurricane Katrina.I wish sometimes to have that problems.. How amazing time it was..I miss this time when you live with parents, when you wake up and on your table is breakfast, when you always have fresh clothes from washing up which you do not have to do, that someone is always worry about you and tells you to look after yourself when you go out with friends, when someone tells you that sitting all day with internet is bad for your eyesI miss that time so much. I felt in that time that the want take back my freedom that I m in prison that I cant move that they worry about everything so much and thats make me angry
Today I wish to someone who can cares about me who can always wait for me MY freedom is 100% depends on me..I can wake up at time when I want but if I wake up at 12 and I had university at 10 and I didnt go its mean that they will kick me up from university..If they will kick me out from university I will have no grants, If I will not have grants for living I will not have place to stay, nothing to eat and no place to go..this is freedom of Mature person. The person who has freedom has duties! If you do not have duties if you cant handel with life you are not enough mature for word FREEDOM..I heard that I can do what I want..i do not understand it muchcoz I cant do in 100% what I want coz there is always someone above me! The life depends on money.When I was 10 I dream about traveling and I knew that I had to speak other language..i known intelligent people who are happy with explore new countries. My parents werent poor but they work very hard for let me go to English class..so when I looked at them and at they hard work I did not let them work for nothing.I do my best for study English and it works! Today I can communicate with people everywhere I go ! It was hard work I had cried and study I had cried after 10 hours at school spent without break and I went at 11 hour to english class.I did my best.Im happy and I dont regret ant tear from my eyes it was WORTH! I dream about traveling..its depends when you are poor student when you dont have support from your parents..when you can count on your own!i decided to go to England to visit place who always give me hope when I was child! Hope for better, normally life. I was working as aupair for 4 hard months I met fantastic people, I made amazing friends and travel around UK! As you see life for me it wasnt always fun and relaxing.I had to work really hard for some time for pleasure! When people go to parties I was really tired after all study that I couldnt movewhen people go to Uk to work for their own cars, houses I went to work and for money from it travel. This year I decied to change my life I wanted more from my university, from my self! U decided to feel freedom, I decided to take my life in my hands! Why not try ERASMUS?i had fulfill documents I had read documents, found information in internet, and went to place where I do not speak their language where I do not have nothing except permission for STUDY! My mum always says that the world belongs for who are bravery! I agree!I came to Spain without knowing any worlds in Spanish, I dint have place to live, no friends no money (until I got grants).First week was amazing, second and others horrible! I had too many problems.. to many blue mood Life is so complicated! When you have your freedom, when you want to go through your dreams and wishes, when you have 100 of dutys and only 24 hours.. when I cant understand people around you, when u want to smile to someone who look at you And is my 1st month living in this adorable country and im happy coz of every day when I wake up..i have fantastic friends, amazing apartment, awesome university, place to visit and full of incredible great time!
Freedom depends on you and your dreams..but dreams depends on your life..I m not sure but something is in it..maybe coz when you have everything like money, family, things which are typical you do not have dreams you dont feel taste of tasting new things, of pleasure of traveling, chatting with others people who you will never see, who has different culture, eating in different way or spending night in other way..that the same tree look different in different country. Im thankful my mother that she infect me with love life! Maybe I have depression but I love who I am and how amazing life is! More troubles you have more aims and happiness after it brings you ..If not God there werent be Hell!if not white there werent be black